Silent Struggles: The Untold Pressures Facing Men in Arab Societies
Behind the stoic façades and societal expectations, many men in Arab cultures grapple with invisible burdens that shape their lives. From relentless career demands to stifled emotions, these challenges often go unspoken—yet their impact is profound. Let’s unpack these struggles and explore why addressing them matters for individuals, families, and communities.
The Weight of Expectations: Four Key Challenges
1. The Career Success Trap
From a young age, boys are conditioned to tie their self-worth to professional achievements. Phrases like “Your value lies in your work” echo through homes and schools, creating a lifelong pressure to climb the career ladder, earn more, and never stumble. A temporary setback or delayed promotion isn’t seen as a normal part of life—it’s often labeled as failure or even “shame.” This mindset leaves men feeling trapped in a race where slowing down isn’t an option.
2. The Breadwinner Burden
The assumption that men must always be the primary providers—regardless of economic realities—fuels financial anxiety. Even in dual-income households, men report feeling inadequate if they can’t single-handedly cover expenses. This pressure isn’t just about money; it’s about identity. As one Jordanian teacher shared: “When my wife started earning more, I felt relief—but also guilt, like I’d failed my role.”
3. The Silence Around Mental Health
“Be a man!”—a phrase wielded to dismiss vulnerability. Many men internalize this, bottling up stress, grief, or exhaustion until it erupts into burnout or worse. Globally, men are 40% less likely than women to seek therapy, and in Arab societies, stigma around mental health amplifies this silence. The result? A crisis masked by stoicism.
4. Success as a Measure of Masculinity
Achievement isn’t just personal—it’s a social duty. Men aren’t striving for goals purely for themselves but to prove their manhood. A delayed career start, a job loss, or financial strain can trigger crippling self-doubt. As a young Saudi graduate confessed: “Every family gathering feels like an interrogation: ‘When will you get a real job?’”
The Data Behind the Struggle
Mental Health in the Shadows
- WHO Report: Men account for 75% of global suicide deaths, yet they’re far less likely to seek help. Cultural norms labeling vulnerability as “weakness” play a key role.
- UK Study (2019): 28% of men avoid discussing emotional struggles, fearing judgment or appearing “unmanly.”
Work, Identity, and Crisis
- APA Research: Men raised with rigid views of masculinity (e.g., “never show weakness”) face higher rates of depression and anxiety.
- Australian Study: Job loss disproportionately impacts men, correlating with increased divorce rates, substance abuse, and suicidal thoughts. For many, unemployment isn’t just financial—it’s an attack on their self-worth.
Arab-Specific Realities
- UN Women/Promundo Study: Across Egypt, Morocco, Lebanon, and Palestine, 50% of men reported shame over unemployment or financial struggles, linking self-esteem directly to their role as providers.
- Domestic Violence Against Men: A groundbreaking Egyptian study revealed that men facing psychological, verbal, or physical abuse often stay silent to protect their dignity.
Breaking the Cycle: Toward a Healthier Narrative
The path forward requires redefining strength. Imagine a world where:
- Emotional openness is celebrated, not mocked.
- Shared financial responsibility replaces the “lone provider” ideal.
- Success is measured by well-being, not just paychecks.
Communities are already shifting. Initiatives like Saudi Arabia’s “It’s Okay to Not Be Okay” campaigns and UAE mental health hotlines signal progress. Yet systemic change demands more: workplaces supporting work-life balance, media portraying diverse masculinities, and families normalizing vulnerability.
